In the dying of evening the spirits mourn,
The memories resurface and take over.
Making it difficult to think about anything else,
Soon the numbing sensation will appear.
That is the ultimate hope.
Every thought revolves around the main source of her pain,
She cries herself to sleep hoping one day she will forget everything.
These tears, they are caused by the realization of all that was lost,
All that can't be taken back and fixed.
She's a hypocrite, always saying everything happens for a reason,
But she doesn't believe it herself.
Every day is a battle, one that is lost to the memories,
Even in sleep there is no escape.
The dre
Can't Hide From The Past by Soulofabandonment, literature
Literature
Can't Hide From The Past
"You're following me." The way he said it made it obvious he was being his usual self, the person that had been missing since the incident that ruined everything between him and I.
"I'm not following you, I'm walking with you. There's a difference." He just shook his head, always being so ignorant. We talked as we walked, about nothing in particular. Random things that had no real importance, except to us it did, and as we walked I couldn't help but smile. It was something he was good at, always had been, no mater how hard I tried not to.
"So, why don't you want to go home?" He asked, looking at me intently. I couldn't help but shrug. I di
I look at you and I see what no one else can see,
I see the real you. The one you hide from everyone.
I never can understand why you do,
The real you is perfect in everyway.
But still, you hide behind this mask you have created.
A mask that I hate, one that has now taken over,
And now I can't tell when you're being you or not.
What happened to make you want to be that person?
Pain does strange things to people, but this is different.
Pain has changed you into someone you're not.
I hate Pain, because he is slowly taking over your life,
And changing you from who you used to be.
If you let go of the pain, will you go back to who you
Take a breath,
Close your eyes,
Try not to cry.
The pain is deep,
Embedded into your soul.
Non-healing and sore.
You know the pain
Will only get worse.
You don't want to,
But you can't ignore
The truth anymore.
What hurts the most?
Even though you are
Neglected and meaningless,
You still yearn for
Their unknowing and lost approval.
You wish for things
To go back
To how they were.
Before the lies,
Before the pain,
Before the coming loss.
Painful Reminders by Soulofabandonment, literature
Literature
Painful Reminders
I look into your eyes and watch as they light up when you talk about her, the way they used to when you looked at me. Before she came along. Now I'm just the friend who listens instead of being the girl you can't stop thinking about and hate being away from. I miss it sometimes, but other times I'm glad to have gotten out without too many scars from you. Not many scars but there were many wounds inflicted by you, wounds that seem to burn when I'm around you. As if just being next to you reminds them of what happened.
The pain is harsh, hard to obliterate. I try to forget all the memories I have of us. The memories that creep up on me and dra
I close my eyes and hope to see you.
The thought of you is burned into my skull,
But the memories are slowly fading.
I long to let them take over,
I'm weak and can't help but break down my walls
Only for you.
"It's not worth it."
The words said to me most play through my mind as
The memories flash by like pictures in a slideshow.
The memories make the pain go away, momentarily.
I know the pain will come back, more excruciatingly,
But I'm weak.
Can you blame me?
You were my first love, the one who first had my
Heart.
You promised to keep it safe, you said you wouldn't
Break it.
I gave it to you for safekeeping, but you abused
You were my shining star,
But now you're just a burning scar.
You're eyes once shone so bright,
Making everything feel all right.
Now I feel the weight of all the pain
Smashing into me like a raging train.
I watched you walk away,
Wishing I could convince you to stay.
The pain is all I fear,
Now that I've already lost all those tears.
Trying to forget
But all I get
Is the burning of my scar,
Which reminds me of my shining star.
Life isn't about finding yourself.
Life is about creating yourself
Isn't it ironic?
We ignore who adores us,
Adore who ignores us,
Love who hurts us,
And hurt who loves us.
I've built a wall
Not to block anyone out,
But to see who loves me enough
To climb over it.
If only the silence could find me,
I could forget everything;
The pain, regret, but most of all-
The loss.
If only I could get my mind to
Shut Up.
Is it possible?
Darkness creeps on me,
In all my thoughts.
"Go away!" I wish I could shout,
But if I did it wouldn't help.
I want to feel numb,
I want to find the silence.
My mind won't let me win.
If only the silence could find me.